Siblings' Cross-Country Run From The Law Ended

I struck upon an idea tonight for a series of poems. Most of the idea is taken from John Leax, who wrote a hilarious book of poems called "Tabloid News." The poet Thom Satterlee recommended it to me, and I in turn highly endorse it. My thought tonight was to visit one internet news site a day, and write a poem that shares a headline with the first news-story to catch my eye. The poem won't bear much in common with the actual event, and I'm going to try not to actually read the story, but to instead write whatever springs to mind based off of that headline. Today, on CNN, I saw a story entitled, "Siblings' Cross-Country Run from the Law Ended." This is what I wrote.

They figured they could have made it

Clear to the Pacific, had Bobby not crossed the line

Dividing his half of the backseat, chanting

Under his breath to Alicia, “I’m not touching you.”

Alicia, in a fake sleep to lull Bobby into making

One more attempt, suddenly reared her arm back

And put a well-aimed apple right between his eyes.

Almost before Bobby could shout, the apple

Took a bad bounce and beaned Darryl, who had

The wheel, in the back of his head, causing him

To swerve off the road.

As they were handcuffed, none of them had much to say,

Except to explain to Eliza, who had been asleep,

What had happened, Bobby pouting that Alicia

Had never known how to take a joke,

Alicia primly saying she was justified

After warning Bobby the day before (when three

Such encroachments took place) that she

Meant war. A deputy, looking into the backseat,

Called the bank to say the loot had apparently

Been spent on slim-jim and red bull,

But that it looked like the receipts were still there.

The evidence overwhelming, none of the four

Bothered to enter anything into evidence,

Though Bobby initially tried to convince

A court recorder to document his impression

Of Darryl’s lame attempt to hit on a waitress

In Tennessee. When asked by the judge

If they had nothing to say on their behalf,

After a few coughs and sideward glances,

Eliza ventured to say, “We should have known

That it really was illegal to be having so much fun.”